Getting organised isn’t just about what you see, it’s about what you feel.
Have you ever been in a completely strange or unusual situation that had you scared? Not the kind of dark alley at midnight scared, the type where you fear the unknown. Maybe you really didn’t know what was going to happen next? Perhaps you were somehow vulnerable and totally our of your comfort zone.
I made a pretty big decision recently that put me in this kind of situation. Something really surprised me, I mean it really really surprised me. The simplicity of organised spaces and actions.
It built a safe cocoon of sheer confidence around me when I could have gone into fear.
Now if this is sounding a bit out of left field hang in there with me.
Getting organised is a powerfully resilient way to build your self-confidence. What’s even better is it will also build confidence and a sense of security in those around you.
The particular situation I put myself in was centered around being admitted to hospital. I realized weeks before that this was going to be only the second time I’ve ever been in hospital, how lucky am I. But, that also meant there was a fear about the unknown. How would I react to the anesthetic? Am I allergic to any drugs? Would they find something during the surgery that wan’t right?
I have a long history with hospitals being a carer. More recently caring for my husband after a serious bicycle accident. When I was younger my mother spent years in and out with chemo and radiation therapy, so these fears had some real life experiences behind them.
If you know me personally you probably know I’m pretty good at putting on the brave face in difficult situations. That doesn’t mean I’m not scared it’s just that you don’t see it. Anyone else relate? I’d more than anything love to share my organised living habits that give me self-confidence. Hope these will help next time you’re in a confidence slump or in a scary situation.
Be Organised Confidence Building Steps
1. Plan for the things you know and put the things you don’t know on a list to ask the right people about
Caution! Be careful not to over plan or over investigate. It can take you back into too many questions with no certain answers. Talk with people who are directly involved or had the same experience you may be going into to fill in any gaps. Opinions are one thing but facts is what will build the confidence for you and in others.
2. Don’t rely on memory for important information retrieval
Write things down that are important. Keep a hand written appointment diary for extra memory retention. A lot of fear comes from “did I forget something important”, I see this all the time. Building extra confidence in your memory is as easy as making a note. Researchers are finding that the act of writing retains more in your memory than typing.
Get a note book and pen and keep in near. In case you need convincing here’s a great article that gives 6 Psychological Benefits of Writing Things Down
. Don’t underestimate the value of the hand written note.
3. Confidence needs a kick start by keeping a check on negative thoughts
It’s almost impossible to create self confidence unless you keep your thoughts positively organised. This is something I do out of habit these days but keeping a check on my negative thoughts wasn’t always natural.
Kick start your confidence with positive thoughts of how you see the situation unfolding. Imagine the way you most would like things to be. What works well is to have a few set mantras to repeat in your mind when negative or fearful thoughts start to invade. I also want to point out that the negative thoughts are not bad. Actually they play an important role but we just don’t want them to take over and push us into panic.
4. Stay relaxed in organised flow
Organised flow is about letting go as much as being in control. Being a bit of a recovered control freak I know this can be a challenge. When we are in situations like going in for surgery, there is a need to let go of the control. It takes trust and the use of clear systems and processes.
Having a checklist, process or system for ALL most likely events, will build your trust in the things you do and situations around you. During my visit to hospital it was clear that every person involved had a clear set of tasks. They were set out in a process and checklist. Every person kept me informed of exactly what was happening and what to expect next, right down to what I would see in the next room before I went through the door. It was the most confidence building experience in a scary situation.
How Do You Feel?
I hope you feel different, I know I do. Going through this experience really gave me even more insight. I already knew being organised played a huge role in how we feel. It is clearer that what we see as a result of being organised is just superficial, although the beauty of order has it’s way of burying into our sense of serenity and calm.
What experiences have you had that have built your confidence? Have you got organised in your home or life to find a new confidence? I’d love to hear your stories and share them with the community, we can learn so much from each others lives.
Many Organising Coaching Program participants have found more confidence and more organisation in their lives, if you feel it’s time and I’m the right person to help you just contact me
would love to see how I could help you.